Story the FirstThey went with my mother's boyfriend and one of his sisters to visit my mother's boyfriend's mother.
She spent a lot of time complaining about her health and her neighbors and various family members and so on and so forth.
My mother's boyfriend's sister tried to end the visit on a positive note, and talked about how things couldn't be SO bad since she had a son who visited her often and grandchildren who came from as far away as Sweden to see her and so on. My impression was that it was a pretty lengthy attempt to cheer my mother's boyfriend's mother up.
My mother's boyfriend's mother appeared to listen to all of this, and responded, "Sometimes I wish I would go to sleep and never wake up."
Story the SecondA group of relatives met up in Boston to do a bit of a walking tour. As often is the case, one group of people walked faster than the other, so they separated into two sub-groups that didn't get much opportunity to talk to one another.
Suddenly, one of the relatives (who my mother's boyfriend's nephew had barely spoken to previously -- I think it was one of his uncles or something) caught up to him and said, 'If you're an American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom?'
m-b-n was caught a little off guard by this question, but responded that he supposed that you would be an American in the bathroom also.
The relative responded, 'Nope! European!' HAW HAW &c.